Regrets and Mistakes - They're Memories Made

Two months have passed. One month has passed.

Last blog post. My father's passing. Respectively.

I'm dreaming with a broken heart.

He'll never see me graduate college.

He'll never see my dreams come true.

He'll never hug me again.

He'll never tell me a dumb joke that I can judge him over.

He'll never leave me another voicemail.

He'll never know how much I loved him.

He'll never forgive me for everything.

He'll never spend another Mardi Gras with me.

He'll never tell me the same story over that he's told me a million times.

He'll never yell at me again.

He'll never brag about me again.

He'll never compliment my photography.

He'll never be on the other end of the phone.

He'll never say he's proud of me again.

He'll never see my final project.

He'll never be there for my mental health days.

He'll never watch a shitty movie with me again.

He'll never see me grow up.

He'll never see my impact on this world.

He'll never let me make things better.

He'll never argue with me again.

I miss you, Dad.

I'll write you letters that you'll never read.

I'll carry you with me. The weight on my heart.

I'll continue to love you.

I'll make you proud.

I'll fix everything. I always have.

I'll do my best to keep up with the world.

I'll take pictures.

I'll be there for Mom.

I'll keep truckin'.

You're gone. Forever.

I won't forget you.

I won't let you down.

I won't delete your voicemails.

I won't stop thinking about you.

I won't live without the pain of your loss.

I won't be as happy as I was.

I won't be the same person.

I won't forget where I'm from.


At some point we say goodbye. For some, it's easier. For some,  it eats at their hearts.
We'll make do with what we have, but what we have is much less.




Goodbye, Dad.




RWH